I'm just a thirty-something gal enjoying life in the Smoky Mtns. I'm a Christian homeschool mom of three little bears and the doting wife to Tracy for almost 17 years. I'm a computer nerd (That is "nerd" not "geek". Please note the difference) and aspiring photographer. (Yes, I take tons of pics.) I work part-time as a pharmacy technician at a local grocery store. I'm studying to become a Certified Pharmacy Technician. 
This is the day I have been dreading for months. It has been difficult these last few weeks seeing Father’s Day commercials on TV and hearing them on the radio. I’d see something and think, Hey! Daddy would really like that! Then I remember… he isn’t here. I still go to call him sometimes. I haven’t been able to bring myself to delete his number out of my phone. Sometimes Tracy says, “Dad came to visit me at work today.” I ask, “Which one?” Then I remember. When we have a family get-together, there is that empty seat at the table. No one really talks about it, but I know what they are thinking, because I am thinking it, too.
Just when I think I’ve cried all that I can… there I go again. It has been almost four months since daddy passed. I know it will get easier. But I think all those firsts will be hard. We were blessed to have him as long as we did. I don’t want to forget daddy. Maybe there will be a day when I can be thankful and look forward to those “special days” as a time of remembrance, and not dread them. Maybe there will be time when my heart doesn’t ache. Yes, I am looking forward to that day.
